It only seems appropriate to follow up on the Alcohol lesson with this one. I decided to post them on the same day so you chumps know how to handle yourselves in both situations, because we all know when you're hungover, you will not read anything. So remember this, after a night of slowly destroying your body...
- Do not do anything at all. If it involves physical activity it's not for you, not today.
- If you have to work, go in, but only to tell your boss that you accidentally ate Taco Bell yesterday for lunch and were up all night pooping. They'll believe you when they see that you look like all kinds of hell.
- Take a shower, you smell like vomit and cigarettes.
- Cheeto's, Dorito's, any member of the EAT-O family for that matter, is a must.
- Post on your most frequently used social media profile "Hungover #fuck" so we all know that you go out.
- Water and Advil will make your head feel smaller.
- Everything is funnier when you're hungover so watch Anchorman, go on reddit, or try to decipher the ancient language of "Drunk" that you sent to your whole contact list last night.
- Basically just don't do anything and eat a alot. I've already mentioned those 2 things but I can't stress how important they are.
If you woke up in a dumpster on top of someones roof, I can't help you, but i sure as hell wanna see how you handle it. Good luck!